Passionless
Crissy June 9th, 2009
What happens when the very thing that you are supposed to be best suited for is the very last thing you want to do anymore?
I am a teacher. I have always been a teacher. From the time I was young, I had no problem instructing my brothers what to do and how to do it. I have taught children and adults. I have taught them most anything. It doesn’t matter what the subject as long as I have a little knowledge in it. I try to be creative but more importantly give them a chance to succeed or fail on their own. Sounds like I have my career cut out for me, right?
I have been teaching steadily for about 12 years. I have substituted for elementary school, taught 3rd grade, instructed teachers and adults on the internet and web site design. I still teach at a community college teaching web design. I teach my children, ages 4 and 11 months, throughout the day on various subjects. I try to make every possible opportunity a teachable moment. Sounds like I’m happy with what I do, right?
The sad part about all this is that I’m not happy with what I do. I’m not as patient as I used to be with my students, the administration is providing their fair share of obstacles and I am just plain bored with the subject matter. I love coding web pages with html and css. Yes I’m a bit of a geek, but I do enjoy it. What I am not enjoying is passing this information on to the next generation.
What I need is a kick in the pants. What I need is change. But what do I change? Do I change location? Do I change subject matters? Do I stop teaching all together and find something else to do? Hmmm.
I love being home with my kids, but as any stay at home mom will tell you, if she doesn’t get at least some time to do what she wants to do the quality of her work will suffer. I desperately want to get my passion back, but I am finding it hard to figure out what is the best thing to do. I have some time before the next semester starts. I’ll let you know what I decide. Until then, I will imerse myself in my children and learning the piano. Maybe being the student for a change will open my eyes to something I was missing.
Entry Filed under: General
3 Comments Add your own
1. Kiirekass | June 13th, 2009 at 3:53 pm
Great to see you writing again! Good luck rekindling your passion for teaching. I still don’t know what I want to do when I grow up and just seem to dabble in this and that which is interesting in its own way. Just don’t get stuck in a rut, life is too short!
2. Dave Hartmann | April 30th, 2010 at 7:05 pm
What has changed in the past Yr to encourage us to take your Web Design Course. Can u suggest a teacher that is interested in teaching the subject matter that is offering this type of course online for credit this summer?
Thanks for your frankness and I’ll keep my comments to myself.
Dave Hartmann
PS- To address your life’s struggle. FOCUS is your problem I think . If you can’t Focus you cant do your best. If you cant you are unhappy. Maybe a part-time Nanny to let you give more time to Focus. I have always loved my job but now find it a struggle since since I have focused much time on keeping my kids on track though the most important Junior Yr in College at Penn State. The last one is almost done with Junior year with a advertising / marketing degree which is why I trying to get a read on u as a teacher for Web Design at MCCC. - i hope you are reading this so i didnt waste my time writing. dh
3. Crissy | May 23rd, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Dave - I just noticed that you wrote this comment. To address your concerns, please let me share a few details…Last year was a trying year for me and I used the blog as an outlet to express my thoughts and feelings. Sometimes I wanted to hear advice and sometimes I wanted to just get my words out. I have worked through my passionless feelings and currently teach the online web design course and I am deciding if I have time to create the next level course. I am a very devoted teacher, even through the trying times and will help any student who is willing. I’m not sure if you or your kids are thinking of taking my online class this summer, but rest assured that no matter what is going on in my person life, there is no sign of it in the classroom (virtual or otherwise).
Leave a Comment
Some HTML allowed:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>
Trackback this post | Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed